12 years ago
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Advice please
I'm seeking some advice from those who have 3 or more kids or come from a family with 3 or more kids, with my 3rd child coming very shortly. How do you or did your moms do it? (staying organized, staying awake and alert even though you're sleep deprived, feeding a family, getting out the door, having a normal conversation w/ your spouse, taking a shower w/o interruption,and any other scenarios I'm missing). Any tips, advice, and/or strategies I would love to hear so please share. PLEASE! I'm becoming nervous and worried here.
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9 comments:
OK, so I only have one baby, but I've discussed this with many friends who have had more than 3 children and they all have said that going from 1-2 is the hardest and going from 2-3 is no big deal. So don't stress too much!
I unfortunately only have 1 as well, nut I have heard the same thing as Alice that added #3 is not a big problem. That's when you need a little more help from Jeff to keep you sane in the evenings. I am thinking the same thing about having #2, not pregnant but thinking about it and I get nervous.
Don't worry about it Lauren. There is no need no need to stress. Everything will work out great. All I can say is to be patient. You will be tired, you will very rarely have shower in peace, getting out the door will take planning...BUT enjoy every second of it. This time of your life will be over before you know it. Enjoy them while they are small and soak up every minute. You'll be awesome!!
Tricia is right. You will be fabulous. Don't stress out about things. Give yourself plenty of time to get your stuff together and get out the door. The first 2 weeks will be the hardest, but hopefully you'll have a little more help then. Have the girls play together. I took my showers in the evening after Jake got home from work so I could shower in peace. Now I do it in the morning after my workout. Aiden will watch a cartoon and McKay hangs out in the swing in the bathroom. Organization: I have a calendar that is on my desk that I have to write everything down on, otherwise it won't happen. I've started planning out my meals for the week on Saturday, writing out my shopping list and getting my coupons together on Sunday and then I go on Monday morning. When the baby is napping and the others are napping or otherwise engaged, I try to do the prep work for dinner, whatever chopping, precooking, etc that needs to be done... assemble the dish then stick it in the fridge. Just pop it in the oven when you are ready. Or the crockpot can be your best friend. A good friend of mine, before her 3rd came, made a bunch of meals and then froze them. With meals that people brought in and the ones she froze, she didn't have to cook for about a month. Normal conversations with the spouse: date night is essential, hopefully the baby won't be screaming all the time and after the girls are in bed, you can just as easily have conversations. Occasionally I would sneak a little nap in the morning. Aiden would know when I was really tired and would either, play with his toys in the playroom or watch a movie, he would even ask if I needed anything. :) Seriously it will probably be much smoother than you are anticipating. I know #3 for me has been pretty simple. But I still get proud of myself thinking that I got 3 kids and myself ready for church and there on time when the youngest was 2 weeks old. :)
Really, my hardest adjustment was having 1. After that I just took the other ones along with what was already going on. As they get older, they get their own activities and things going on... I'm just glad I didn't have 3 at once. yikes. ok, the rambling is going to stop now.
sorry...... absolutely no good advice from me! I am just relishing the chaos of my life. I am told it goes by fast enough that some day I will miss it. So I am living it up! I'm sure this advice will be super helpful at calming your fears.... ;)
Since I have 3, (although one isn't mine, as you know)I feel that I can comment. I do have moments during the day where I have free time. Somedays I have more, but there is a schedule to my day for the most part. I actually took all 3 of them to a soccer game last week. Luke walked, Sophia was in a stroller, and Matt in the baby Bjorn. It is frustrating at times, but it is possible.
Lo, you're already a great mom and #3 will just ease into all the Shaw fun. Seriously, you've probably already done all the really hard stuff and your girls will be able to help out more.
Going to three kids pretty much kicked my butt so Alice's friend must have been a rock star. Having said that you will survive because you always rise to level of challege you are given as a mom. Organization in key, being satisfied with less than a pefectly cleaned house is important, crock pots are life savers. Make double dinner before you give birth and freeze portions so that you can pop it in the oven for a dinner after new baby arrives. Having uniterrupted showers may not happen, but don't worry everything comes and goes in phases . . . you'll be just fine as long as you take it a day a t a time.
By the way- thank you for your sweet offer of taking things to California for me. I really just couldn't get my act together but I wanted you to know how much I appreciated the offer and your thoughtfulness. I hope you had a great time.
You are so precious to have this concern. I have never been a mother in this situation... but I have done some observing. I remember once my mother told me that when she had 3 little ones she didn't get peace and sanity until she gave up the expectation she could keep a perfectly clean and orderly house all the time. Set the priorites. I think the most important thing is to make sure there is some quite time time with each child and husband everyday, reading, praying, talking.... so they know how much you love them. If only for a few minutes each a day. That is my humble advice. I have no worries... follow the direction of the spirit and all will be well.
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